The Java Jive

Breaking My Silence

2007-01-16T13:18:00.000-08:00

for this important announcement...

Choose Your Own Adventure is coming to Ipods...

Check out www.cyoastore.com to download a free sample! Oh, the memories.

Ok, back to silence.

007

2007-01-02T13:17:00.000-08:00

Resolutions? Resolving not to have resolutions? What are you doing this second day of 007?

The Emperor's New Shoes

2006-12-27T06:58:00.000-08:00

Rare is it that you can find something that just makes everything all better.

Children laughing. Your favorite scent (apple pie, morning coffee). Shutting someone down in Fantasy Football.

Or the perfect shoe. Yep, even you manly men have to agree, when you find a shoe (dress, sneaker, boot, etc.) that just says...you...it just makes everything alright.

Yesterday, I found that shoe. And it's so all good.

Confession is Good for the Soul (Brother)

2006-12-22T07:20:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays! As we look toward 2007, I feel it's time to come clean.

I cannot keep my hands off X-mas gifts under the tree. This year's been a little different, because I've been too busy/tired/distracted to try to figure things out, but for some reason, I love to know what's going on over there in that brightly lit, wonderfully decorated, and extremely enticing corner. It's probably best if a certain NFL Top Rankings checker (see jillyoung.blogspot.com) didn't set anything out until "the day of..."

Like I said, I've been good so far...but with 12 hours to go until "Our Kwanzaa", I don't know how much more I can take.

My methods are Solid Snake like for sure...like checking to see what's inside of the chocolate without anyone knowing. Prodding, sticking tiny holes in tissue paper, a quick shake, an inappropriate touching...nothing (in the past) has been out of bounds, and the packages still look in tact. A true ninja of Presents, if you will.

I feel much better now. Happy Holidays, all!

So Weird

2006-11-30T20:18:00.000-08:00

Remember, several of you asked for it.

6. Much like K's problem with apples, I'll eat things with peanuts in them (brownies, Snicker bars, chewy granola bars), but I can't eat peanuts straight out of the can. Yech...

5. I have several CDs full of TV Theme Songs, that I sing along with, memorize, and can recite word for word, note for note. Yet it took me ____ to pass the stupid bar exam, which is just a big memorization exercise. Which is why when I put regulations and policies to theme songs, I passed. True story.

4. I can listen to a single song all day long and never get tired of it.

3. I love commercials. Sometimes, after we've watched a program on Tivo and finished it, and a certain someone goes to do something else, I'll watch the show again, but watch the commercials and speed through the show.

2. I secretly act like my life is a TV show, complete with where cameras would be, who would appear during the main title as opposed to after the main title (in the Special Guest Star portions), and what would be good cliffhangers.

1. I always read the manual for anything that I get that has a manual...and more than once.

Laurie P., Jeff P., ESPNgirl, Ellyn, Tim C. and White Chocolate Cox, consider yourselves tagged... If you don't regularly update your blog, put it in my Comment Section...stat~

All Good

2006-11-30T06:58:00.000-08:00

After tomorrow, we may not get a chance to talk for awhile, as the Boys and Girls are coming back, so I'm thinking tomorrow should be another "List Day", 'cause I love me some lists!

And it gets you up on my current faves, likes, dislikes, etc...so come back tomorrow, gawk at my answers and fill your own in.

Everybody's gonna do it.

Not Good

2006-11-30T06:54:00.000-08:00

I saw a Metro bus this morning that had "Scrumptilious" on the side, and it was all brown, as if to appear like a giant Snickers bar.

Unfortunately, it looks like something else, which I don't think they were aiming for...

A Tale of Two Churches

2006-11-28T07:21:00.000-08:00

Have you ever been the only one dressed up in a suit on Sunday Morning? I have.

Have you ever been the only one not dressed up in a suit on Sunday Morning? Just had that pleasure too.

Hope your Thanksgiving was as full of surprises as mine!

Shh...

2006-11-20T07:21:00.000-08:00

I'm wearing the same pants I had on yesterday, because they are ridiculously comfortable.

Child's Play

2006-11-15T19:34:00.000-08:00

The Child in Me is not giving up without a fight.

He's been under wraps this week while the 33 (oh man, I forgot I'm 33 for the last post!) year old has been "taking care of bizness" on the H. It's been long hours, but thanks to the graciousness of some family friends, I've been walking to work. I've kidded that maybe I should consider Manassas as my weekend home and live out here...

The adult Me has enjoyed several perks this week that the Child is not amused with...such as, being called "Sir"...and liking it...

Seeing a stroller at Union Station and making a mental note of it...for when the time for such an item is needed...

Having an amazing Samsung LCD TV for his own personal use this week to relax with...and turning on the captions, to feel more at home...(that's not a sign of being old, but I thought a certain someone out there might think that was cute)

The Child is feeling snubbed, and like I said, is beginning to act up. The Child desparately wants to find a line tomorrow night and stay up with the teens and Dads that can't say no to little Johnny, in the fleeting hopes of buying a PS3...

The Child almost hopped on the Metro to go see Borat at the theatre and then eat an entire Matchbox pizza by himself, but was persuaded to go play a 9pm soccer game...no clear thinking adult would have done either, mind you...

So with all this "being an adult" behavior I've been going through, I expect the Child to throw a tantrum soon...he really wants to play PSP right now...but perhaps the Adult will read a couple of chapters in his book before that. Then maybe we'll hunt the Helghast on the planet Vekta for a couple of minutes.

PS. What would you camp out for?

I once camped out for tix to a Virginia Basketball game with some residents...turned out it was one of the best I ever attended. I did it for Madden 07, with some incentive from L, and I'd probably do it if the Fat Boys had a reunion tour (the "one of them is dead" thing would be pretty hard to get by though...)

Peace.

Thr33

2006-11-13T19:12:00.000-08:00

I'm noticing alot of 3s these days.

This Friday, the Playstation 3 launches its assault on the world, and against the Xbox 360 in particular (at least they'll be plenty of Wiiis...)...

This Saturday, if you know what's good for you, put down your Sixaxis and turn that TV to ABC (three lettered network) for Ohio State vs. Michigan at 3:30...lovely!

This being Monday the 13th, I'm sad I've only got 3 Prison Breaks left, and 3 months til the return of LOST...

Three is the loneliest number, three's a crowd, three dog night...

In other news, there's a new Fantasy League that may be the shape of things to come...it's at Fantasysoapnet.com, where you have a team of Soap Opera characters that get points for getting slapped, staring into space, removing articles of clothing, etc...just the speed for those who aren't football junkies, or for "men" who have wives that know more about sports than they do.

This could be a great trend for our favorite shows, like a Serialized Series League, where you could have Jack Bauer, Sawyer, and Lorelai Gilmore on your team, and score points for their various antics...or Fantasy Church...where you can score points for the last person to leave, who remembers their bible, teen to show up in the most inappropriate outfit...

Fantasy Blogger? Hmm...well, tim3 for bed! Lat3rs!

The Votes Are In...

2006-11-09T06:57:00.000-08:00

...in more ways than one. Thanks for all of you who have expressed your concerns, I know you're looking out for the Java, and the Java feels warm and fuzzy, just like he does as he is sipping his Gingerbread Latte (the Holiday flavors are back at Starbucks, get yo'self in the spirit of the season!) I'll be sure to let you know what the next chapter is for me, but it's not time to get ahead of ourselves, so no need to worry. If you really need to worry, worry about K-Fed, and how is CD got an F in Entertainment Weekly....the Gravy Train for him has definitely come to an end.

K-Fed. Playa.

Truth be told, you all had great ideas and expressed good thoughts about my GPs, and I will most likely do all 3, but according to the votes, it looks like I'll be taking DIY classes at Lowes...I'll let you know which ones I take, and marvel at what I learn once I apply it! Dirty hands, indeed!

Have a wonderful Thursday, those of you in the DC area, all I have to say is, 70 degrees y'all!

Your Vote Matters

2006-11-07T10:18:00.000-08:00

Guilty Pleasures, we've all got them. But today, in honor of Election Day, I am going to give you the opportunity to vote on which one I will let go! This is as real as it gets, people, so let your voice be heard!

GP#1. Star Wars. Down in my own "Sithsonian," I've accumulated enough SW SWAG (stuff we all get) from all over the place, but this ride has gone on for about as far as it can go. Sadly. If you vote here, you are voting that I will take the top 21 items of my collection to keep, and EVERYTHING else will be sold or given good homes to collectors. 21, you say, that's an odd number? It's my fave, and from the proceeds, I'm thinking a pretty nice sound system can compliment my movie habit!

GP#2. American Idol. Every year from its beginning, I've given a lot of time to following the highs and lows of America's finest (and infamous) crooners! Much love goes out to Kelly, Ruben, Fantasia and a little to Carrie, who's got a bit of attitude...but her version of Alone still gives me goosebumps. Anyway, a vote to eradicate this GP will mean NO AMERICAN IDOL all season long, and only watching the last 30 minutes of the finals. (This same thing happened when I purged Survivor from life). You're thinking, this isn't hard...why bother? My answer is a (sheepishly) given, "I love this show, so much so that I am about to tell you something not many of you know...I have been to a concert." There you go, now you know how much of a sacrifice this will be.

GP#3 Not a DIYourselfer. I am not a do it yourselfer...I hate handy projects that have anything to do with hammers, glueing, toolbelts, almost anything that's not a gadget that you might find at a Home Depot or Lowe's. If it's not from Target or IKEA, I'm probably not going to get into doing it. I take great pride in not being interested in getting my hands dirty. But your vote to do away with this GP will bring a change. A vote here will mean I have to attend 3 classes at the aforementioned HP or Lowe's, and use the skill that I learn at one of the classes to better Stately Young Manor. This is going to be tough...if I had a choice to install a garage door opener or go to the dentist, I would go to the dentist. Seriously.

GP#4 Phil Collins. Easy Lover, In the Air Tonight, Something Happened on the Way to Heaven...on second thought, I'm taking this off the ballot. Sorry, I just can't give up PC.

Alright, polls close at midnight, and majority rules, no matter what. And you can only vote once!

ps. Make sure you vote for real, in the real election today.

pps. Almost scored in soccer last night, so close, baby! There were so many hands on me from the other team, I feel like I'm owed at least a couple of dinners.

!

2006-11-06T05:59:00.000-08:00

The Skins winning...a final edit to be done...fantasy picks with point spreads...pre-election jitters...a soccer game tonight...new Prison Break!!

Could this Monday be any better?

Check back tomorrow, because in the spirit of voting, you get to vote on my...you'll just have to check back tomorrow!

Theatre

2006-11-02T09:30:00.000-08:00

After reading the Post article on "Babel", I' m really intrigued to see it. I'm a sucker for the buzzzzzzzzz...

What else do I need to get out and see?

Vote or Die II

2006-10-31T09:11:00.000-08:00

Awhile back, I said you'd get to do a little vote involving me! Be on the lookout, it's the vote of a lifetime! Or at least until you vote on November 7th!

Halloween Haunts

2006-10-31T07:24:00.000-08:00

I remember getting the Old School Batman costume (from the Adam West era) when I was a young'un...complete with utility belt and a mask with a "white" face under the blue mask.

Very innocently, Mother decided to color in the face with a brown marker, so that it would match my Dark (actually Medium...see the previous post) skin...

And I remember getting upset that she did that. I look back and realize that she was just trying to be a Mom and it was completely harmless. I think I'll call her and finally forgive her! Boo!

Best costume: The Joker (again, Batman themed) Won 2 trophies and a total of $50 with that one. That's next year's story.
Worst costume: A TV. I stuck a cardboard box over my head and two foil wrapped pencils in a visor. It was off and and in a corner in 14 seconds.

Africa

2006-10-30T05:46:00.000-08:00

Some quick thoughts for you to enjoy, 'cause it's a Monday and you're probably still distracted by wondering where did your wonderful weekend go...

It's not news that Johnson and Johnson have "Perfect Blend" band-aids, for those of us with a little more chocolate in our skin tone (they come in Light, Medium, and Deep). What is news is that now that I had my first chance to use one ( a little "bruise" after last week's soccer match), I've found out that I am Medium, according to their scale...I always thought I was Deep. The scale should probably be Dark, Milk Chocolate, and Cappuccino. I probably still would have picked Dark.
Special appreciation to J, A and J, to A, A, J, and L for decorating and putting on one of the most fun Hallowe'en Hoedowns in memory!
Special prayers to G, a Stranger in a Strange Land, I'm proud of you buddy for what you are committed to do for the next 5 years. We'll be your prayer warriors!
My new musical obsession is Jojo. I don't know where that voice is coming from, but it's nice to hear real talent, and anyone who samples Africa from Toto and makes it work is the johnniest in my book. Reading her Liner Notes of Thank Yous made me want to write my own, and since I don't really have a CD dropping anytime soon, I might just give snippets in posts. It's a nice little mental exercise to do when you're bored/driving/trying to go to sleep, thinking of all those who you would thank for molding you, shaping you, and even people you don't know or have never met (as in, Special thanks to Jojo for being the new hotness in song! Stay real, girl!)
Target's weekly circular says that Mission Impossible III will be available starting at 8am this morning. I know I was worried!
Nothing is impossible for God--Luke 1:37
Impossible is nothing--Adidas

Nightmare On My Street

2006-10-25T06:25:00.000-07:00

5:49am I woke up AGAIN wondering how I was going to finish a paper for a class that I'm not in for a professor I haven't had in 8 years! This morning's episode was almost too real.

It's almost time to assemble my own team of Dream Warriors (Nightmare on Elm Street 3) so I can excise whatever it is that I think I still need to complete.

Speaking of excising nightmares, I think I have finally figured out what I'm going to be for Halloween. I was aiming for low maintenance, but more than your average cowboy/doctor/lawyer.

Nixed:
Purple Pie Man
Soccer Player
Randy/Michael/Bo Jackson
Tornado (blow on people and squirt them with water guns)
Wicket W. Warrick

Stay tuned!

JavaJive LIVE--UPDATED!

2006-10-23T10:22:00.000-07:00

The New CD "It Ain't Easy Bein' This Good" drops November 5th. Believe it.

Never one to let a good joke die, here's the latest on our TRACKS...

1. Black to the Future
2. B. Muffin was a Playa'
3. I Don't Know What You Want (But I Can't Give It Anymore)
4. Cold Hands, Warm Heart
5. !
6. Micro$oft
7. Cash Money Chaos
8. Kombat (sample from Jesus Take the Wheel, feat. Carrie Underwood)
9. Lights Camera Blaction
10. The Chocolate United States of America

and the new hit single "Deal or No Deal" featuring JoJo, Bono and the Edge, Joe Satriani, Charlotte Church and Mannheim Steamroller...

In stores and out of the back of C. Bedard's trunk, November 5th!

Shake. Pour. Make.

2006-10-19T06:37:00.000-07:00

Much like the XXL Ziploc bags that have just come out that are very cool, I've just seen a commercial for Bisquick in a plastic container that allows you to shake it, pour out a pancake or two, and eat it up!

I wonder if it comes with a magic time portal that will give me time to eat breakfast. That would be very cool.

Tomorrow, I'm going to give you, my dear audience, the chance of a lifetime. Get ready!

Heart

2006-10-17T20:26:00.000-07:00

The Dillon High School Football team has shown more heart in two episodes of Friday Night Lights than the Virginia Cavaliers have shown in half of a real season. What's the deal with my school?

And to reward a coach for subpar performance, our athletic director has given him another year at the helm.

Imagine a world where you mess up, offer little leadership, revel in mediocrity...and you get promoted.

Come to think about it, it's not all that uncommon.

300 Million

2006-10-17T06:24:00.000-07:00

The United States waits patiently today on the arrival of our 300 Millionth citizen...and as usual, many people are expressing worry about where are we going to put all these people.

Answer: all the states we have previously ignored, some with good reason. Like North Dakota.

Let's not forget Wyoming, Montana, and from personal experience, Iowa. There is a ton of room in Iowa, and plenty of corn and soybeans to use as food.

Why am I not president yet? =)

Beautiful/Disaster

2006-10-16T09:08:00.000-07:00

I've always hated the Dentist office, no offense to dentists, future dentists, or sons and daughters of dentists. I am not as Kramer put it, an anti-Dentite.

However, the hygenist who cleaned my teeth this morning said that I have done a ... wait....

"beautiful"

job in taking care of my teeth. That is the first time I have ever received that word in relation to my checkups. I usually hear words closer to "disaster", so I am in a good mood.

Today's checkup, and Tony Danza still being on the air, prove that there are no end to miracles.

New Obsession

2006-10-13T18:44:00.000-07:00

1 vs. 100. Must get on this show.

It's not really that good of a show, but I think I could get paid.

It would really be me vs. Mr. Jennings. And you always bet on black.

Scaredy Cat

2006-10-12T11:03:00.000-07:00

I'm hoping J and I get to take in the Grudge 2 tomorrow. I don't know why I love scary movies, my heart loves to remind me that it's not sure how much fright it can take...

I used to hear scary music on the TV as a kid (because I have excellent hearing) and would run and hide. Mom would ask what's wrong, and I would say, "It's a scared! It's a scared! Ask her to do the impression, she loves to tell that story.

My friend L told me of a guy she knew who was trying to grasp English, and would say, when he was scared, "I'm so scary!" We still use that on each other. That's a u had to be there, but trust me, that's a funny one.

The Feel Good Story of the Hour

2006-10-11T11:17:00.000-07:00

It was Labor Day, and yes, I was in my other home, Best Buy.

As usual, the one guy that decided to help J and I was worthless, bringing the wrong boxes from the warehouse, staring glaze-eyed at me when I asked questions, and sending me up front to the equally useless "Geek Squad" to find more questions than answers. Like my own little live episode of LOST.

And then, this little boy came up to me to show me his Thomas the Train, and to let me know how much fun he was having. When his mother called him over, he started to walk toward her, turned around and gave me a hug (to which his mother said, he's a hugger). As if to say, don't worry about these salespeople...just have fun.

Leave it to the little ones to teach all the important lessons. I'll file it with "Sharing is cool," "Play with everyone, no matter what they look like" "Be slow to anger" and "Smile, it makes you look good."

Free To Be...

2006-10-10T07:35:00.000-07:00

The CW has a new campaign for it's network and fall programming...

Free To Be Fierce (Tyra, America's Next Top Model), Free To Be Sassy (Lorelai, Gilmore Girls), Free To Be Powerful (Clark Kent, Smallville)..

Mine is Free to Be Smooth (and I'd be pointing to my dome...it's better than shiny...)

What are you Free To Be?

And now, I'll Take Your Questions...

2006-10-09T18:06:00.000-07:00

(flash bulbs snapping, hands raised, pencils scribbling)

Q: So where have you been?

Everywhere. Really.

Q: What's with the lag in writing?

I've been doing a lot of reading! I'm kidding, you guys are smarter than that...actually, I've been a little busy, and trying to figure out what to do next, concerning blogging...I love doing it, 'cause you find out so much about me, and I find out a lot about you! So I've done some thinking, and now, have created this new site.

Q: What's with the changes...you think you're some sort of secret agent? What makes you so special?

Because of where I am, who I am, where I go on a day to day basis, and what I do there, it's best to keep things fun, but a bit more subdued. One day when we've all retired, and sitting rocking in our chairs on the deck of a wonderful southern estate, I'll let you in on what's going on here...but for now, let's keep things on the d.l. I'll be referring to you, myself, my girl Friday, and other things with initials or witty little nicknames, just to stay off the front page of publications. This was a choice of my own accord, but one that may be necessary for, shall we say, the future.

Q: Gee, you're so serious...I don't know if we like this "new" you.

Alright, fine. Let's loosen it up a bit then...how 'bout some rapid fire Q's, then!??!

Q: What's been going on?

Went to China (thrilling, pics are up on snapfish, I'll send the link out in an email...it was fun being in the minority over there...oh wait...), celebrated 3 years of weddededness bliss (PFChang's was off the heezay, and trading traditional 3 year-gifts was sweet!), joined a soccer team, enjoying tons of football, got the first season of Voltron (Defender of the Universe), lovin' the weather and Fall TV, wondered if my SW collection has finally reached a point where it's time to, um, retire, and hey, the Monopoly game is back at McDonald's!! Can life be any sweeter?

Q: O boy, how many Best Buy bucks you got already?

5, baby!

Q: I didn't even know Voltron was out...and who do you think wants all that SW junk when you get ready to unload it?

Believe it...and let's not get crazy here...you realize there are some people that actually have bought a full set of stormtrooper armor so they can join a club called "Vader's Fist?" As long as these people exist, you best believe they'll want what I've got.

Q: What are the best new shows I'm not watching?

Heroes, Studio 60, and Justice...and you've already let Smith die a quick death...don't let this happen to Friday Night Lights, are we're going to fall out!!! And give love to our old friends in the Office, LOST, and the Amazing Race! And you need to be keeping up with football for your Pick'ems and Fantasy Football...

Q: And how's Fantasy going?

Let's just say you can't spell Dynasty without an "S" or a "Y". Or a "T". Or an "N".

Q: Nice, what else?

I've got 6 books that I am trying to stay acccountable on reading...2 for fun, 3 for enlightenment and higher learning, and 1 to learn how to do lead blocking in Madden '07. I'll try to let you know how I'm doing.

Q: Anything else?

The Departed was gritty, can't wait for the Grudge 2, the Block Party at FXCC is going to be tight, and can someone make T.K. from Monday Night Football disappear?!?! He's killin' me!

Q: Why should we believe you're going to "keep us posted?" We've been ready and waiting for a long time...

I know you've been waiting...but you're definitely not ready.

Next up: The Feel Good Story of the...Hour.

Jive Talkin'

2006-09-23T17:45:00.000-07:00

Congratulations! You've found the "new" me. This time, the names will be shortened to protect you, me, and dupree, but the stories are real.

I can't make this up.